[Book Review] Never Have I Ever: My Life (So Far) Without A Date by Katie Heaney

“It was all hormones and chaos”. This was my favourite line from Katie Heaney’s Never Have I Ever and I thought it was a pretty accurate description of the dating scene. This is the life story (so far) of Katie Heaney and her misadventures with men. As the title suggests, she’s never been on a date, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t been trying to go on one. She’s just learned that she’s not a lighthouse. You’ll understand this metaphor better (and it makes a lot of sense to me) when you read this article Katie wrote for The Huffington Post. She’s a BuzzFeed writer who’s been on a hunt, for a really long time, to find the perfect guy.

I picked up this book for a number of reasons, but mostly because my pal Chelsey from Chels and a Book highly recommend it on her blog and I was instantly intrigued. When it was finally in my possession, I was smitten when I discovered that she dedicated her memoir to her best friend Rylee (yay for friendship), but I knew I was fully hooked when I read about her love and dedication for JTT. Oh and not to mention her massive disappointment when she learned that Jonathan Taylor Thomas didn’t actually do any of the singing for Simba in the Lion King. Blasphemy, I know. It might be important to note that this crush developed in her middle school days and not in 2014. Mad props to Katie if she’s still has a flame going for Simba. I get it, I really do.

This memoir is broken into four parts; the early years, high school, college and grad school. Wants, needs, expectations range during each section. I think it’s important to note that even if you were a dating machine in high school and college, you will relate to this memoir. You will identify with her frustrations with the dating terminology, what does “going out” even mean? And you’ll remember that one time you kind of, sort of went out with a guy, but never managed to take it to the next level. And what about that time you started talking/flirting with a guy with a girlfriend, because it was safer and easier than actually putting yourself out there. Katie has a way of pulling you into her world and somehow makes you feel like you two have been best friends for years and years. There was one point in reading that I actually said out loud, “yup, she’s 100% right about that” (it was when she said that the best episode in the Sex and the City series was ‘The Post-It Always Sticks Twice’).

If you’re in your 20-30’s and you’ve ever owned anything created by Lisa Frank, this is a memoir that you will thoroughly enjoy. You will be able to relate to Katie and you’ll agree that we’ve all created unrealistic expectations of what love looks like (thank you Nicholas Sparks and Disney), but with age, comes wisdom. It took me a long time to understand the things I know now and it was encouraging to know that we singletons aren’t alone. At age twenty-five, Katie has a clear and concise understanding of the woman she’s become and when it’s meant to be, it’ll be.

Oh and because I love it so much, I’m sharing the post-it scene, because it makes me happy.